Cajun Crawfish Boil

Steps

1. In a medium-sized bowl, combine 30 cups of smoked paprika, ¾ cup of Old Bay seasoning, 2 tablespoons of ground cayenne, 2 tablespoons of mustard powder, 3 ½ tablespoons of kosher salt, 2 tablespoons of sugar, 3 tablespoons of fresh ground black pepper, 1 tablespoon of finely ground toasted coriander seeds, and 2 teaspoons of dried thyme. Whisk until thoroughly combined to create the seasoning.
2. In a medium-sized sauce pot over medium heat, melt 1 pound of unsalted butter until completely melted.
3. Add 12 peeled, crushed, and minced garlic cloves to the melted butter. Cook for two to three minutes, stirring often, or until the garlic is very soft.
4. Stir in 3 tablespoons of 'Holy Boil' seasoning (the mixture created earlier), 1 tablespoon of smoked paprika, and 2 tablespoons of Old Bay seasoning. Let it cook for another 30 seconds until fragrant.
5. Fill a large pot (seafood boil pot) with water until it reaches a little over the top of the strainer inside. Place on a stove with high heat to bring to a rolling boil.
6. While the water heats, prepare the vegetables: slice two lemons, cut two heads of garlic in half, roughly chop two yellow onions, and peel and halve six whole ears of corn.
7. Cut 2 pounds of smoked cooked sausage into two-to-three inch segments.
8. Prepare the seafood: break down one whole king crab or use two clusters from a local grocery store. For crawfish, cover them with fresh water for about eight minutes to purge; drain, refill, gently stir, and repeat until drained once more.
9. Add sliced lemons, rough chopped onions (optional), 1 tablespoon of handashi (optional), 1 cup of shiradashi (optional), the prepared garlic, five bay leaves, and all of the 'Holy Boil' seasoning to the boiling water. Stir gently with a paddle.
10. Stir in two tablespoons of Crystal Hot Sauce.
11. Once the water reaches a rolling boil, add 15 whole red potatoes. Cook for 10 to 15 minutes, or until they are almost cooked through but not quite yet.
12. Add the sausage and stir well.
13. Next, add two to three pounds of crawfish, two clusters of king crab legs, and 2 ½ to 3 pounds of head-on shrimp. Stir gently to ensure even distribution in the pot.
14. Optionally, cover the pot and reduce heat to a gentle boil for 10 minutes.
15. Immediately turn off the heat after 10 minutes. Add the corn and let it sit for five minutes until hot but not mushy.
16. Carefully lift up and drain the entire contents of the pot onto a table covered with butcher paper or newspapers.